To trust the Test
by Lysore
Summary: If the Test really is an elimination process as Tori said, then it wasn't inconclusive. Choosing ceremony!AU Erudite [oneshot]


**Notes:**

 _The original works are not mine, never were, never will be. This is done purely for my own enjoyment, and yours too, should you happen to like what will follow. More specifically: some passages have been taken/paraphrased directly from the book. Those passages are obviously even less mine._

 _On the other hand, since there is no beta, I can lay claim to all the mistakes present in the text !_

* * *

"Welcome. Welcome to the Choosing Ceremony. Welcome to the day we honour the democratic philosophy of our ancestors, which tells us that every individual has the right to choose their own way in this world. Our Dependents are now sixteen. They stand on the precipice of adulthood, and it is now up to them to decide what kind of people they will be."

The Test was supposed to tell me that. It has been created to tell people in which Faction they belong. Why did it have to tell me I am Divergent? I had never failed a test before and the first time had to be for the most important test of my life.

"Decades ago, our ancestors realized it was humankind's inclination toward evil, in whatever form it appeared, that was the cause of a warring world."

Time was running out and I needed to come to a decision. I only had one certitude: the Test wasn't supposed to ever be able to give an inconclusive result. That wasn't how it was built. Plus, my mother had been in charge of the recruitment the volunteers who administered the Test for years. Me and my wandering ears would have heard her talk to my father about some of them reporting back the Test had failed on some Dependents. The Erudite wouldn't have allowed their Test to be defective anyway so the only explanation left was a human error. I had asked Tori a lot of questions when she had been preparing my Test. Maybe I distracted her too much and she had set a larger error margin than the norm in the parameters.

"They identified five major defaults they believed to be responsible for the world's disarray. To eradicate them, they divided us into five Factions."

If the standards had been looser than normal, it meant I hadn't failed and the Test had given me my answer. I clung to that idea: I was desperate for an explanation and this was the best I could come up with. I just needed to think things through to figure out which one it had been. Armed with this decision, I felt a rush of confidence go through me and focused back on Marcus' speech. I could do this. Luckily for me, he had just started to speak about the Factions themselves. Let's see, Tori had explained the Test as an elimination process, but her interpretations of my choices during the Test had probably been as accurate as her ability to administer it correctly. Better not rely on them too much and trust myself to figure everything out on my own.

"Those who blamed aggression formed Amity."

I hadn't chosen the cheese.

"Those who blamed duplicity created Candor."

I had lied to the man with the newspaper. I still would.

"Those who blamed cowardice were the Dauntless."

I had been brave enough to jump on the dog.

"Those who blamed selfishness made Abnegation."

I had jumped on the dog to save the girl at my own risk and without any hesitation.

"And those who blamed ignorance became the Erudite."

I hadn't chosen between the knife and the cheese because I had no preference. It was because I had been ignorant of the reason behind such a choice.

"Working together, these five Factions have lived in peace for many years, each contributing to a different sector of society."

The Test had worked correctly with its two eliminations. That meant I was probably right and Tori had misparametered something.

"Erudite supplies us with intelligent teachers and researchers."

During the Test, I had reflected on the best way to protect myself from the dog and come up with an intelligent, rational answer.

"Abnegation fulfils our need for selfless leaders in government"

Up until now, considering Erudite had never been a possibility: my father had been coming back home with tales of Erudite's misdeeds for years. I shouldn't even have the gall to consider joining them. Given some time, my father could probably accept any transfer, even one to the hellions of Dauntless. Abnegation or not, he would never forgive me for this particular betrayal.

"Amity gives us understanding counsellors and caretakers."

But yesterday, Tori had said she had never met a curious Abnegation before. As far as I can remember, I had always been questioning the world around me.

"Candor provides us with trustworthy and sound leaders in law."

Ruling out Erudite only because my father was biased against them could be a mistake. Faction before blood, that was the motto of our society. I should take Caleb's advice to heart and think about myself today, not only about my parents.

"Dauntless protects us from threats both within and without."

Still, why was I even agonizing over whether or not I could choose Erudite? I had always dreamt of joining Dauntless. This was what I should have been focusing on since the beginning.

"But the reach of each Faction is not limited to these areas. We give one another far more than can be adequately summarized. In our Factions, we find meaning, we find purpose, we find life."

'Choose wisely, little girl.' The Factionless man had said.

"Apart from them, we would not survive."

Trying to fool myself was no use: I wanted to know what the Test had said and that meant accepting Erudite as a possible result. A wrong choice today would mean failing my Initiation. I didn't want to become a Factionless like that man, never.

"Therefore this day marks a happy occasion—the day on which we receive our new initiates, who will work with us toward a better society and a better world."

And with this, the parade of choices began. Very few of my fellow Dependents hesitated in front of the bowls. It looked so easy for them, as if all of them were persuaded they were making the right choice. The other Test administrators must have been more conscientious than Tori.

"Caleb Prior," says Marcus.

My father had never been able to conceive Caleb or I could want to leave Abnegation but my mother's earlier behaviour had told another story. She had hugged me and whispered she loved me, no matter what. That could have been a goodbye. She had also hugged my brother in a similar fashion. Had she noticed something in him too?

Caleb moved to the centre of the room and accepted his knife from Marcus with steady hands. I saw him straighten his spine, deftly press the knife to his skin to draw blood, and hold out his hand over Erudite's bowl, all in one fluid and confident motion. The already pinkish water turned into a deeper shade of red with the addition of this new blood.

I should be shocked. I should be echoing the outraged mutters and cries I could hear coming from Abnegation's section of the room, if only in my head. But only one thought kept circling in my head: 'I should have known'. If anything, I was angry at myself for not foreseeing this. The signs had been there: the books on his desk, his shaken composure after the Test, his advice yesterday evening. Everything had pointed to it. Unlike my mother who had observed us both, I had stupidly refused to see the obvious.

I scanned the crowd of the Erudite: they wore smug smiles and were nudging each other in congratulations. An Abnegation transferring to Erudite had always been a rare occurrence. With the current enmity between the two Factions, no one had been expecting this kind of transfer this year.

The Abnegation were behaving in a much more negative manner. Instead of their usual placid demeanours, they were speaking to one another in tense whispers and glaring across the room at the Faction that had stolen one of their members from them.

"Excuse me," Marcus called out but the crowd didn't pay attention to him so he shouted, "Quiet, please!"

Marcus' cry of the next name resonated powerfully in the now silent room: "Beatrice Prior."

I let my eyes skim over the room to find my parents. My father looked shaken to his core. His eyes were now pleadingly glued to mine. I wished with all my heart I could give him the reassurance he was seeking, but I couldn't. I had always thought I would trust the Test. I knew I would do just that once I was done untangling the mess Tori had made. I saw his expression shutter and a wave of overwhelming guilt swept through me, but I wouldn't budge on this. I hadn't made up my mind yet and not even the tears I was seeing for the first time in my father's eyes would change my mind. I won't let anyone or anything stand in the way of my future: not Tori, not a too lax Test, not even him.

"Beatrice Prior!" Marcus called for the second time and I lurched from my seat in embarrassment. I went down the stairs with small, hurried steps, even though I would have preferred to take my time, to give myself more time to think. Fortunately, my brain didn't let me down in my time of need and brought forth a facet of the Aptitude Test I had yet to consider: it was an elimination process. That meant a Faction, once eliminated, couldn't be brought back for testing: if we could check an aptitude for a Faction over and over again, the Test would be endless.

My elation at having finally found a solution left me as swiftly as it had come while the acrid taste of bile rose up my throat. I had lied to the man when he had sworn to me the truth would have saved him. I hadn't chosen the knife either.

I reluctantly stepped on the podium, the heart heavy with these discoveries. I had finally found out what Tori had missed yesterday: Abnegation, and more importantly Dauntless, had been both confirmed and eliminated in turns during the Test. That was where the mistake had laid.

Once the knife was in my hand, I turned to gaze longingly at the Dauntless.

I remembered bitterly how tiring climbing the twenty flights of stairs leading up to the auditorium had been. On top of that, I had always found their tattoos and piercings shocking. Perhaps it was for the best: Dauntless would have eaten me alive.

I turned my head a little further to look at Caleb, who had taken his place behind the Erudite members.

Contrarily to all the other Factions, the Test had always validated Erudite and had never eliminated it. Why did it have to be this Faction out of all of them?

My brother stared unflinchingly back at me and nodded a little, as though he knew what I was considering and agreed. Could he want me to join him in his new Faction? Did he believe I could find my place there?

I turned back towards the bowls standing in a perfect line in front of me: Dauntless fire, Abnegation stones, Erudite water, Candor glass and Amity earth.

Was I truly considering this? My father would never forgive me this choice.

I forced myself to adjust my grasp on the knife and touch the blade to my left palm. I clenched my teeth tightly together and dragged the blade down with a low hiss. It stung more than I thought it would have. One more point to the Test. Dauntless members couldn't afford to have low pain thresholds.

'I trust the Test'. I took a shuddering breath, and let this thought repeat over and over in my head like a mantra. 'I trust the Test.' I had always believed I would follow the path it would show me. Time to own up to this decision. 'At least,' I thought as I planted my feet firmly into the ground and held my arm out, 'I won't be completely without family there.' It was a good starting point, I supposed.

"Erudite."

'I trust the Test.'

* * *

 _Thoughts?_


End file.
